Well, this blog doesn't have relevance only for fifty plus, or for women going through menopausal mayhem. I am in my fifties and going through the mayhem too but I plan to present the topic in jocular vein. I am a person with strong inclination towards dark humour even during class room situations. But then with age as it is progressing, I am turning it to really enjoyable satire instead of dark moody blues. Here I am thankful to advancement of age as I am finally free from those low days. Every female will agree what a relief, it is or it will be.
To be honest, I was never at ease with thoughts of aging. I am someone who has always felt comfortable feeling being in thirties or early forties even when I was a young woman, in twenties. I was a gawky awkward teenager, not at all comfortable with my physical assets, too much too early and always inviting the wrong kind of attention .I was most happy and confident self in my 20s and 30s.Now my heart is stuck in 50s and refusing to believe that I am in fifties. You can call it the brain fog which has clouded my mind and to be honest I don't mind remaining in 40s ignoring the hot flashes, the mood blues, threat of increase in weight and body pain.
Actually now that I think deeply, I have never behaved in age appropriate manner. I got along well with either my juniors or with seniors. The bestie associations that one enjoys in colleges and in 20s before settling for rest of the the life with selected few, at least that's what I have seen happening, I got close to my school time friends in my late 30s and early 40s when I realized they remembered me. Now in my 50s, I am not sure again. In a way I am turning a gawky oldie, when most people are established mature self.. I have enjoyed my childhood after my marriage at 35,with my hubby and trust me I have had the best and most progressive parents. I still enjoy nursery rhymes and my favorite memories of childhood where as I don't want to live most of 50s expected decorum.
Coming to being my femme fatale self I can call myself that I bloomed in my late 20s and 30s behavior and personality wise and despite my current age I want to dress up to my young heart liking instead of age appropriate expectations of the social circle. Actually now I am now more rebellious than most of the teenagers are. If my thoughts seem puzzling, well I am certainly having brain fog and I don't mind it dear!
